Working with our Hands Brings Beauty and Rest

I started reading The Hidden Art of Homemaking by Edith Schaeffer. The book says we should not sit around dreaming of our "dream house". We should make our current home a place that reflects creativity, beauty and our tastes. My husband is the type that sees something in the garbage and sees the potential of beauty. I see it and it is just garbage. After eleven years of marriage and God showing me much about His creativity, I am seeing more beauty wherever i look. I use to just want to buy things in a store rather than make them. Now, I am wanting to make Scripture art of our favorite verses, decorate each room in our house to reflect a theme and to have our home a place of beauty, order, creativity and rest.  Working with our hands rather than just thinking about it helps us to find expression in creativity.

Scripture:
Proverbs 31:19 - In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

Observations:
1.  She works with her hands
2. She didn't use a machine to spin (before the spinning wheel)

Application:
I don't spin clothes or even sew or make clothes but I do like to write, use scriptures as art forms, make art with my son.  I definitely am a thinker and a philosopher. I would read and think any day over work with my hands. I worked as a lawyer for eight years before my son came. I am use to studying and working my brain. I always did house work but I must say I grumbled about it. I felt my mind was not engaged and I became restless. This last week, I worked my body hard, and I realized that my brain was more quiet.

God has instructed us in Psalm 131 not to concern ourselves with great matters or things too wonderful for me.
Psalm 131
My heart is not proud, Lord,
    my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
    or things too wonderful for me.
² But I have calmed and quieted myself,
    I am like a weaned child with its mother;
    like a weaned child I am content.
When we work with our hands, our minds many times are engaged on the task at hand. We are not idle. We therefore don't have time to concern ourselves with great matters or things too wonderful for me. This Proverbs 31 study has been helping me to focus on what my hands can make rather than what my mind is thinking.

When I work with my hands whether it is journaling, writing, creating a scripture art, cleaning my house, picking berries for jelly, pulling weeds, thinning vegetables or helping others, I have noticed that I sleep more deeply and my mind is more at rest. When my mind is at rest rather than restless, my home has a peace and beauty beyond any physical appearance.

Prayer: Lord, let my hands work hard rather than be idle. Thank you that you are a creative God and that we are made in your image. Thank you Lord that we are to reflect your glory. Lord, may I not think of things too great for me. I am sorry for the times I feel responsible for figuring out the problems in the world rather than reflecting your Kingdom here on earth.

³ Israel, put your hope in the Lord
    both now and forevermore.

Delight means something that gives great pleasure to. As a verb it means to give great pleasure, satisfaction, or enjoyment to; or please highly. I have been thinking about this word alot since Sunday when Pastor Blake Shipp gave a sermon about our true name - one whom God dwells and delights in.  I have thought about God rejoicing over me with singing. 

 I heard this song once that just spoke to my heart. It is called Amazed and the lyrics go like this:
"You dance over me while I am unaware
You sing all around But I never hear the sound
Lord I'm amazed by You, Lord I'm amazed by You, Lord I'm amazed by You
How You love me,How wide,How deep,How great, Is Your love for me"

In all my trying to bless others or be a blessing, I sometimes forgot that I am a blessing to God. Read more about this in my blog entry from May 25, 2012.

God is a blessing to me but how am I a blessing to Him? How does he delight in me. He just intrinsically takes pleasure in me for how he made me. The way I understand this is through being a mother.  I take pleasure in my son and am well pleased with him just for who he is. He brings me joy apart from what he does.  God also sees who we will be not just how we are behaving in a moment in time.

  My husband and I want my son to know he is a blessing so here are some of the ways we express this delight:

1. I give him more than he asks for or expects as surprises. This morning, he woke up wanting a cookie or a lollipop. He must have been dreaming about one. Now, I could have said "no we have to eat breakfast first." This morning, however, I wanted to do something out of the ordinary. I was tempted to just give him 1 cookie yet I remembered that the Lord gives us more than we can ask for or imagine. I wanted to surprise my son and so I gave him two cookies and a lollipop all before breakfast. My son's smile can light up a room. His dimples get so big, his face lights up and he gives me this smile that makes my heart melt. I just enjoy seeing him smile.

2. We pick themes from books and live them. For example, we have a wacky wednesday story by Dr. Seuss so some wednesdays we have wacky wednesday in our house.

3. We listen to his stories, we laugh at his jokes. We try to listen more and talk less.

4. We just watch and observe him. The eyes are good receivers.

5. My husband and son do "fast kisses".

6. We play baseball and hockey in our living room (we do away with rules like no balls in the house). Our living room is a room we live in and do things as a family.

7. We let him be who God created him to be rather than who we desire him to be.

8. We let him ask questions without fear that he is being disrespectful.

9. We take adventure walks

10. we go down the slides and climb the playsets with him

11. We sit on the floor and play board games, mold things out of playdough, play with dinosaurs

12. We take him to many new places so he can explore and see what he enjoys.

13. We do most things as a family - sit together in church, go on dates, have family meetings, family church singing and Bible reading. We do projects with him in the home instead of thinking he is too small.  He loves to be a part of our family and to help out.

I am going to continue to think upon how and why God delights in me and how I delight in my son.   I would love to hear your thoughts!

Early to Bed like my Grandma

All my friends know I am a night owl. I use to stay up until 1 or 2 every night. The many late nights of studying in college and law school reinforced my "night owl" traits. I thought 9 or 10 pm was the beginning of the evening.

Then in March of 2012 my husband started a new job that required him to leave the house by 6or 6:30 (earlier if he goes to the gym at Cornell). Since I am waking up ealier, I am getting tired by 9 p.m. Some nights I am tired by 8 p.m.

When I was younger, my Mom and I would walk to my Grandma's house and she would be in bed at 7 p.m. She did read for awhile before falling asleep. I remember thinking that I could never go to bed by 8 p.m.

I am learning that I like the morning hours. I seem to accomplish more when I am up by 6 a.m. I think better. I have a more regular schedule.

Yesterday, I jumped out of bed at 4:45 a.m. but didn't go to bed until 11 pm. I definitely worked hard all day picking strawberries and processing strawberries. Then I had a mess to clean up before going to bed. I am learning that some nights require me to stay up later but that God always strengthens me when I sing and rejoice in Him.

The Scripture in the Proverbs 31 study is Proverbs 31:18 "She sees that her trading is profitable (work is good) and her lamp does not go out at night."

Observations: (1) the work we do should be accomplished well (2) Sometimes we have to get up early and go to bed late to finish what is set before us. Sometimes the work can wait. I am learning to do the work instead of keeping it to do all at once. It is more manageable to do tasks with my son when they are broken up and routine.

Application: I am learning to do the work instead of keeping it to do all at once. It is more manageable to do tasks with my son when they are broken up and routine.  My friends now that I like to play and do a lot of fun stuff with my son. Lately, I have been doing more work as a lot of projects came up all at once. I am learning to have fun and play in the daily work and not just segregate work and play. We can play while we work. I am learning that I can sing while I work. I am learning that I can tickle my son and laugh while we work. I am learning we can play games while we work. I do like to work hard and play abundantly. I am learning to celebrate God in each moment. He is showing me how to put all things first.

Prayer: Lord, thank you that we can play while we work. Thank you that you are a God of joy. I pray that my days would reflect the fruit of your love and that I may be filled with joy. Lord, please forgive me for grumbling about work at times. Thank you for your strength.

This is the Day

Yesterday, I shared how one of the very first things I say in the morning after my son wakes up and I lie down with him is "Today is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it." At the time of writing my blog entry, I did not know that the next days reading for the Proverbs 31 study was Psalm 118:24 which is  ^"This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it."  I believe this is the best start of the day in acknowledging God gave us THIS DAY to rejoice and be glad in it.

Philippians chapter 4 is also all about rejoicing when you are in plenty or in need or when you are full or hungry (all circumstances). Philippians 4:13 - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.


Observations from Psalm 118:24 and Philippians 4:13:
1. We are to rejoice and be glad each day but especially on the Sabbath
2. We can do the things God has put in our life to do because He strengthens us

Application:  The application I came away with is that each day I will rejoice.  Rejoicing to me is singing to God, laughing, enjoying people He has put in my life, celebrating, and enjoying His Creation. This week, I want to make Sunday the day set apart and made holy as the Lord's day extra special. I have been thinking for a couple of years on the Sabbath. I want it to be a day of joy and celebration. It is a day that I don't want to carry burdens, sorrow, schedules, work and other cares that go along with a normal week. Although I celebrate every day, I want Sunday to be extra special holy onto the Lord. One thing I was thinking is having Sundae Sundays, special music, dancing, games, celebrating with church family and friends, sharing testimonies, eating more on the Word and just sitting at Jesus' feet.

Prayer - Thank you that we can rejoice in you. Thank you that you strengthen us for each task and circumstance we are in. Thank you that you give us a rest from our daily work/chores. Thank you that our rest is found only in you not following rules and not just in giving up things. Thank you Lord that Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath.

Jesus says "COME TO ME"

God inhabits the praises of His people. (Psalm 22:3).  God is definitely present when we praise and worship in spirit and in truth.  In God's presence is fullness of joy. (Psalm 16:11).  We are filled with joy as we praise Him. Psalm 51:13 says "Give me back the joy that comes when you save me(restore to me the joy of your salvation) Keep me strong by giving me a willing spirit(and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me"

While thinking upon Proverbs 31:17 which says "She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks."  My King James Version Bible says "She girds her loins with strength and strengthens her arms." I like the King James version as it uses the same language that is used in Ephesians 6:14 (spiritual warfare passage) which says "Gird your loins with truth." It is talking about a battle in which we must be strengthened for.  I see this passage not as a physical strength but the type of character her life will need to face the difficulties ahead. It is a call to preparation as "gird up" alludes to the custom of gathering the long flowing garments into the girdle and tightening it before exertion.

When I think of Ephesians 6:14 which shays gird your loins with truth. I think the truth in God's Word and God's Holy Spirit illuminating our mind to the truth that Jesus spoke is our true source of strength.

I am definitely seeing a connection between praising God, God being present in those praises, and the joy I received in His presence. The joy of God's presence is what strengthens me and allows me to work vigorously with all my might. Joy gives one energy for every task that needs to be done (mental, physical, spiritual).

Scriptures for Proverbs 31 Study
Proverbs 31:17 - She girds her loins with strength, and strengthens her arms.

Nehemiah 8:10 - Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”

Ecclesiastes 9:10 - Whatsoever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, where you go.

Observations:
1.  Joy is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10)
2. A willing and eager heart comes from time in the presence of the Lord which gives rise to praise, then joy and then strength to do the tasks you have to do
3. Work with all our might now so that God may be glorified and lifted up.

Application:  Many times, we want to just get going with our day to accomplish everything on our list.  Yet Jesus says "Come to Me"  He does not just say to do more or to not do something. He says Come to Me.  We are to come to Jesus. Our part is to praise Him and to sing of His goodness. He is enthroned in our praises.  In his presence is joy forevormore. Because of this joy of the Lord, we are given strength to accomplish taks.  We are kept strong in the joy of the Lord as he continues to give and sustain the willing spirit.

When my son wakes up, one of the first things I say after I lie down by him is "Today is the Day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it." I desire to have more of the joy of the Lord as I know without this joy I do not have the strength, tenacity, eagerness, willingnesss, or vigor I need in order to accomplish the work the Lord has prepared for me.

The application step I want to take is to praise God throughout my day in whatever I am doing. I want to sing of His goodness and love.

Prayer: Lord, I thank you that you simply say "Come to Me". I need the joy of the Lord in order to sustain me. I do pray that you keep me strong by giving me a willing spirit. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and renew a steadfast spirit within me. I don't want to just have a schedule or list of household chores or menus. I want your holy presence to reign as I sing praises. I want my house and my heart to be a holy sanctuary.  Thank you Lord that in your presence is joy forevormore.

In the Silence...

Two days after Easter, I lost my voice. It slowly came back but it is not "my voice". It sounds different - raspy, deeper, cuts in and out, strained, hoarse, breathy and well not my voice. WIth the loss of voice, I have also experienced pain in my neck and throat.  I miss talking and reading twenty books to my son. Anyone who knows me knows that I like to talk.  I have a lot of follow up doctor appointments to investigate what is going on.  In the meantime, I am suppose to be on vocal rest which the vocal therapist says is one hour in the am, one hour in the afternoon and one hour in the evening. The hour in the afternoon is easy because I will write while my son sleeps. Instead of focusing on the pain and loss of voice, I am learning to listen.

In the silence, I am hearing my son ask many deep questions. Instead of answering all the questions as if I had the answer, I am listening to what he thinks the answer is. I am listening without a response other than that is a good question and we should write that down and explore it.

In the silence, I am hearing my husband's needs and concerns with a heart of compassion rather than voicing my answers as to what he should do. I am tempted and start to tell him the answers but then realize my throat hurts and it is causing pain to talk.

In the silence, I am learning to see. I am capturing smiles. I am learning to see when people are in pain and need a smile or a hug rather than a word of "encouragement".

In the silence, I am learning grace.

In the silence, the pressure of having to know it all slips away into peace.

In the silence, I am singing in my heart rather than my voice. More songs are coming to be now and I am singing without saying a word.

In the silence, I see others more than myself.

In the silence, humility shines.

In the silence, a quietness soothes my soul as God says

To Plan or Not to Plan

Usually every year, I have all of our weekends planned for the whole summer. This year was different. I was told on February 13, 2012 that I was going to miscarry. On February 17, 2012, I miscarried. On March 19, 2012, I developed a high fever (sometimes as high as 104) until I was hospitalized on March 23, 2012 for blood sepsis. My liver started shutting down. My heart was beating rapidly and the Doctors could not find a cause other than labeling it "viral".   I then developed huge 5 cm cysts on my ovaries that caused extreme back pain, bloating and stomach pain. A few days after Easter, my throat was swollen and I lost my voice (possibly viral but still under investigation). Since April, my vocal chords have been damaged, swollen, irritated and enlarged.  More recently, I have developed pain in my joints with weakness in my right arm.

 I say all these things to say that the Doctors have called me a "mystery" but I call it deliverance from God. During these strange, hard health problems my strength had to come from the Lord as I didn't have my own strength.  I believe it was fine to have all of our get aways and weekends planned as long as I was living a life of dependence and submission on the Lord. The Lord has always been faithful to cause a plan to not come to fruition if it was not His will. Also, there have been many times where the time would come to do that plan and both my husband and I knew despite our wishes and wants that it was not the Lord's best for us.

Also during this time, God has directed my steps by:
1.Having me meet a Chaplain at Lourdes who gave me a name of Dr who is cancer Doctor but also specializes in lyme.  I had lyme disease 10 years ago. During our discussions, I found out that this doctor treated someone with end stage ovarian cancer and she survived. This information was helpful because a friend of a friend needed this information. God had put me in the right place at the right time despite my nagging not to be hospitalized. It was the next morning after the hospital stay that I met the Chaplain.

2.Bringing many things in my life by showing me how brief life is and to live for the eternal. My grip on the temporal is becoming looser.

3. Delivering me over and over (seen his healing over and over). The viral infection went away and the liver started functioning well as soon as my Elders, Church and friends started praying. This showed me the power of community.
4. Showing me that this Summer God had different plans for me. The weekend that we normally would have went to Sesame Place, I sensed from God that we should not go. Our whole family wanted to go. It was good we didn't go because that Saturday it was important for my husband to spend time investing in learning about some new things for his job. We didn't know this but it came up on Thursday.  Subsequently, my husband and I have both had it on our hearts to work heartily onto the Lord. We have been more committed to have our home look organized and beautiful (not just as a physical dwelling but a place where we want God praised and lifted up).

5. We usually go to Yogi Park during Grandparents weekend, we didn't call and reserve a spot due to everything going on. It was a good thing we didn't because we learned on May 20th that a pastor candidate for our church was coming. We needed to be at Church to meet the Pastor, ask questions, be focused in prayer and discerning. Also, my three year old son developed chicken pox that Friday we would have left. God again directed our steps as to where we should be.

Scriptures:
James 4:13-15 "Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow, we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell and make a profit." whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.  Instead you ought to say "If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that."

Observations:
1. Life is a vapor (it is short)
2. Attitude of humility and dependence on the Lord (daily manna)

Applications:  Committing works to the Lord is not just in prayer asking God what we should do. It is a heart attitude of submission to the Lord and a life of utter dependence. It means I would change my plans even if I had reservations if the Lord spoke something to my heart.  It is not just saying "the Lord willing over and over" in a repetitious way. Many people may not make plans. Many people may just tack on The Lord Willing to anything they want to do. There may be some that are afraid to make any plans because they don't know what God's will is. As I read this passage in James, the application that comes to me is that it is ok to make plans. It is fine to have a schedule. Many times a schedule and plans gives a framework to our days. When I don't make plans or a schedule, I sometimes just go about each day without purpose and without seeking God. Schedules and plans give order. However, there are times that I sense in my spirit that God is saying no once a plan is in order. At that point, I may have time invested and money invested in that plan. It is in those moments, that I need to submit to God and say Yes to his plans. For me, I don't have peace unless I submit.

In Isaiah 30:21 "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." The Lord does speak even if you are in the midst of making plans, already made the plans, already stepped out in doing those plans. When God speaks through His word and into our hearts, it is important to submit.

Many people may think having such an ordered, planned life is "unspiritual and controlling" as we are making our own plans. Others may think that no schedule and just waiting for God is "unspiritual and lazy". I am learning to live in an ordered life that can do without schedules and plans just to delight in people or things God puts in my path. I am also learning to live an ordered life where we do have a very detailed structure to our days.   The middle or tension between these two is knowing that the Lord directs my steps. I will hear his voice behind me whether I turn to the right or the left telling me this is the walk, walk in it. I thank God He is not finished with me yet. I have a very detailed schedule that I plan to follow most days but I am sensitive to God's spirit and learning to not see people or things as interupptions to a schedule. I want to be available to people and relationships and not just accomplish things on a schedule. I believe the purpose of a schedule is to provide a framework or order so that in this order and quietness, I can hear God speak.  His words from the Bible never come back void. Acts 17:28 says in Him, we live, move and have our being...we are his offspring/children. This is a life of utter dependence.

Application Steps:
1. Did you/I pray through the plans and schedules we made? Did we have planned time, private time, and prolonged time with the Lord?
2. Did we roll off our concerns, wants, burdens onto the Lord and leave them there willing to do we committed to do on our schedule and/or willing to hold the plans loosely if God did not allow them to come to pass or tells us no?

Prayer: Lord ,thank you that we can live in confidence that you will direct our steps. Thank you that everything is in your hand. Lord, thank you that you inhabit the praises of your people. May your praises always be on my lips.